Overcoming Internet Addiction For Dummies

A guidebook to beating internet addiction and screen overuse and for living a fuller life 

There?s no escaping it?we live in a digital world. We work, play, socialize, and learn online, and the Internet provides many amazing opportunities. Unfortunately, because of our basic biology, we?re all susceptible to overuse and addiction to screens. Video games, social media, porn, and even scrolling online, taps into that pleasurable dopamine reward system. So, when is it time to log off or put the phone down and get help? Overcoming Internet Addiction For Dummies gives you the information, resources, and the self-assessment tools you need to discover how much is too much, along with practical suggestions on what to do about it. 

Learn how to take back control of your time and attention?or help your kids or loved ones get control of theirs. This comprehensive, user-friendly overview of Internet addiction is full of helpful and proven methods to help foster a healthy, balanced, and sustainable life with screens. 

• Discover the basic biology of addiction, including why children and teens are especially susceptible. 
• Become aware of the cognitive, psychological, and physical effects excess Internet and screen use. 
• Learn how social media, video gaming, and Internet pornography could be getting in the way of real-time living. 
• Find out why smartphones are not smart for you to use all the time.
• Understand the science of how and why you can become addicted to your screens so you can unplug more easily and use your time for what matters most. 
• Empower yourself and your children to build a positive relationship with the Internet and digital technology.

This book can help you and your loved ones plug back into life and show you where you can find information, resources, support, and treatment. Overcoming Internet Addiction is about taking back control of your time and attention and learning to manage your screen use, so it doesn?t manage you. 

Introduction 1

About This Book 2

Foolish Assumptions 3

Icons Used in This Book 4

Beyond the Book 4

Where to Go from Here 5

Part 1: Getting Up to Speed on Addiction Basics 7

Chapter 1: Defining and Overcoming Internet Addiction in a Nutshell 9

Defining Behavioral Addiction 10

Understanding How and Why People Get Addicted to Screens and the Internet 11

Digging into Digital Devices and the Internet 13

Recognizing the Threats 14

Social media 14

Streaming audio and video 15

Video games 15

Online gambling 16

Online shopping 17

Online investing 17

Online sex and pornography 18

The dark web 18

Identifying the Signs and Symptoms of Internet and Screen Addiction 19

Recovering from Internet and Screen Addiction 20

Exploring self-help options 21

Getting professional help 22

Raising Tech-Healthy Children 22

Balancing Technology with Real-Time Living 23

Understanding the End of Privacy as You Knew It 24

Recognizing the myth of anonymity on the Internet 24

Understanding the disinhibition phenomenon 25

Cybersecurity, cyberstalking, and cyberbullying 25

Chapter 2: Studying the Biology of Addiction 27

Understanding the Evolutionary Biology of Addiction 27

Discovering humans’ original addictions 28

Distinguishing the new brain from the old brain 29

Identifying the Parts of the Brain Involved in Addiction 29

Examining the role of neurons and neurotransmitters 31

Recognizing the Mind and Body Aspects of Addiction 35

Being wired to maximize pleasure and minimize pain 36

Exploring tolerance, withdrawal, triggers, and relapse 37

Comparing physiological dependence versus addiction 39

Looking at addiction as a mind and body phenomenon 40

Discovering how addiction is a normal medical problem of living 40

Chapter 3: Understanding Why Kids Are So Susceptible to Internet Addiction 43

Exploring the Biological Basis for Addiction in Children and Teens 44

Getting to know the brain’s pleasure centers 44

Buffering the desire for pleasure 45

Tossing sex hormones on the fire 47

Seeing the Impact of the Internet and the “Maybe” Factor on the Developing Brain 47

Recognizing Lack of Experience as a Contributing Factor to Addiction 49

Watching out for overprotection 49

Thwarting normal development 50

Exploring Other Factors That Contribute to Addiction in Children and Teens 52

The constant presence of smartphones 52

The “need” for technology 53

The growth of social alienation 53

Technology as a coping strategy 54

Genetic influences 54

An intolerance of boredom 54

Chapter 4: Discovering What Makes the Internet and Smartphones So Addictive 57

Eyes on the Prize: Factors Involving Focus on a Screen 58

Examining ease of access and near-constant availability 58

Talking about time distortion 59

Giving you the world online: The illusion of online productivity 61

The Good (or Bad) Stuff: Factors Involving Content 61

Finding out about content intoxication 62

Mixing stimulating content and digital devices 62

Understanding instant gratification 63

Defining infotainment 64

This Must Be the Place: The Internet as the Car, Map, and Destination 64

Getting the word in and out: Broadcast intoxication 65

Weaving a web: A story without an end 65

Apprehending the myth of multitasking 66

Telling a social story: The net effect on people 66

The Human Factor: The Internet as a Digital Drug 67

Grasping the power of “maybe” 68

Seeing how dynamic interaction keeps people coming back for more 69

Part 2: Breaking Down Addictive Technologies 71

Chapter 5: Examining the Addictive Nature of Social Media 73

A Social Network: A Rose by Any Other Name 74

Recognizing What Makes You Come Back to Social Media for More 75

Looking at social validation looping 76

Understanding the big deal about variable reinforcement 77

Seeking Communication and Self-Esteem — But at a Price 78

Seeing Why Social Media Can Be Counter-Social 81

Broadcast intoxication on social media 81

Cyberbullying 82

Cyberstalking and trolling 83

Finding Relief: Life beyond Social Media 84

Chapter 6: The Endless Stream: Binge Watching TV and Online Entertainment 85

Missing Your Life While Being Entertained: The Ease of the Binge 86

Understanding the allure of endless choice 87

Finding the power of instant access 88

Recognizing the pitfalls of effortless starting 88

Unpacking user experience engineering 89

Seeing the influence of social media 90

Looking at Other Problems of Watching TV All the Time 92

Intensity is addictive 92

TV acts as your social companion 93

One form of screen use is almost as good as another 93

It’s a Choice: Screening the Stream 94

Chapter 7: Exploring Video Games and Video Game Addiction 95

Wondering How a Video Game Can Be Bad for You 96

Understanding What Makes Video Games So Addictive 98

Providing stimulation and variable rewards 98

Feeling a strong sense of identity and competence 100

Using complex skills in an exciting way 102

Becoming part of something bigger than yourself 103

Elevating social status and finding respect in the gaming community 104

Connecting on a shared challenge 105

Changing the rules as soon as you think you know them 106

Digging Up More Trouble Hidden within Video Gaming 107

Distinguishing social comparison from social connection 107

Putting in time to keep your edge 108

Seeing the power of role playing 108

Exploring e-sports 109

Looking at loot boxes and paid treasures 110

Appreciating the concern over violent games 111

Chapter 8: The Risks of Online Shopping, Gambling, and Stock Trading 113

Taking on Cybersecurity 114

Yes, your computer can get sick with a virus (and more) 114

Don’t trust, and still verify 116

Shopping Online: The Socially Acceptable Addiction 117

Trading money for convenience 118

Getting a hit of dopamine 119

Placing a Risky Bet with Online Gambling 120

A perfect (and dangerous) storm: The Internet and gambling 121

Playing just to play, not to win 121

Rolling the Dice with Online Investing 123

Clicking before you think — over and over again 123

Equating investing with gambling 124

Chapter 9: Combining Addictions: The Power of Porn and the Internet 125

Understanding Why Pornography is So Appealing 127

The potency of pornography even before the Internet 128

The increase of online pornography addiction 130

The development of other serious problems from porn addiction 131

Identifying the Many Manifestations of Online Sexuality 132

Sexting 133

Dating and hook-up sites 134

Webcams, toys, virtual reality, and robot sex 136

Fantasy, role play, and anonymity 137

Fetishes 138

The Psychological, Biological, and Legal Repercussions of Online Sexuality 139

Appreciating the Internet as a place to learn and teach about sex and sexuality 139

Weighing the social, moral, political, and ethical impacts 140

Exploring potential health and medical consequences 141

Considering legal issues and risks 142

Discussing thought crimes: Crossing the line online 143

Part 3: Diagnosing and Treating Internet Addiction 145

Chapter 10: Identifying the Signs and Symptoms of Internet Addiction or Overuse 147

Recognizing Cognitive Symptoms 148

Denying and distorting the need to be online 148

But everyone’s on the Internet! Rationalization 151

Studying Psychological and Emotional Symptoms 153

Anger issues 153

Mood and other psychiatric symptoms 154

Reward deficiency syndrome 157

Seeing the Physical Symptoms and Health Effects of Too Much Tech 158

Sexual desensitization and erectile dysfunction 159

Obesity and sedentary behavior 160

DVTs and blood clots 160

Repetitive motion injuries and phantom vibrations 161

Eye strain 162

Gray and white matter changes in the brain 162

Hypertension 163

Tech Stress Syndrome: Elevated cortisol levels 165

Sleep and circadian rhythm disruption 166

Looking at Behavioral Issues When You’re Addicted to the Internet 168

Shortened attention span 169

Impatience and instant gratification 170

Distraction issues (especially while driving) 171

Multitasking myths 174

Decreased academic and work productivity 175

Chapter 11: Taking a Self-Assessment 177

Warning Signs of Internet Addiction in Your Spouse, Friend, or Loved One 179

Virtual Addiction Test 180

Smartphone Compulsion Test 181

Digital Distraction Self-Test 184

Greenfield Video Game Addiction Test 186

Shopping, Gambling, and Investing 188

Online Pornography Test 190

Cybersex Abuse Test 192

Child Technology Test: Is Your Child Too Connected? 194

Chapter 12: Adopting Self-Help Strategies 199

Remembering That Life Isn’t Lived on a Screen 200

Recognizing that it’s tough to limit tech use 201

Striving for lower-tech (not no-tech) living 202

Decreasing your stress with less tech 203

Disrupting Your Tech Habits with a Digital Detox 204

Defining a “digital detox” 204

Getting set for success 205

Monitoring and Limiting Your Time and Content on Screens 205

Turning off Internet access at a specified time 206

Limiting specific content 207

Establishing Values-Based Tech Use 208

Introducing a values map 208

Deciding where your eyes go 209

Removing Notifications and Addictive Apps 210

Knowing that notifications invite you to waste time 210

Getting rid of apps, websites, and software 211

Filling Your Life with Real-Time Activities 211

The Real-Time 100 Living Plan 212

Other self-help forms 214

Support groups, treatment resources, and organizations 217

Chapter 13: Exploring and Evaluating Treatment Options 223

First Things First: Talking about Terminology 224

Checking Out Different Psychotherapies 225

Using cognitive behavioral therapy 225

Understanding medication-assisted therapy 226

Trying family support groups and therapy 228

Focusing on group therapies 231

Figuring Out Which Treatment is Best 232

Prepping for Treatment 234

Surveying motivational enhancement and harm reduction strategies 234

Assessing readiness for change 235

Using Alternative Interventions and Other Treatment Approaches 237

Undergoing outpatient counseling and therapy 238

Considering intensive outpatient and partial hospital programs 239

Looking at residential treatment centers 239

Conducting a Tech Sabbath 240

Examining weekend and extended detox 240

Knowing about digital detox 241

Exploring wilderness retreats 241

Working with a coach 242

Exploring EMDR 242

Investigating interventions 243

Treating Co-occurring Psychological Issues Connected to Internet Addiction 243

Understanding anxiety 244

Digging into depression 244

Talking about obsessive-compulsive and impulse control disorders 246

Studying ADHD 246

Seeing the connection with autism spectrum disorder 247

Noting other addictive behaviors and substances 248

Part 4: Living a Balanced Life with Internet Use in Its Proper Place 249

Chapter 14: Solutions for Real-Time Living 251

Reminding Yourself of the Importance of Changing Your Tech Habits 252

Getting an accurate picture of your tech time 253

Digging into the “screen drunk” phenomenon 254

Balancing Your Values with Your Tech Use 255

Getting Real with the Real-Time 100 257

Building and Maintaining Good Tech Habits 258

Searching for the humanity in technology 259

Being mindful with your tech use 260

Keeping the Internet as a tool, not a destination 260

Overcoming urges, cravings, and boredom 262

Chapter 15: Parenting in the Screen Age 265

Following Common-Sense Parenting Guidelines 266

Setting limits together as a family 267

Being clear, consistent, and calm 268

Setting Boundaries and Limitations 269

Establishing low-tech days 270

Undergoing digital detoxes and tech reboots 270

Declaring Tech Sabbaths 271

Monitoring Screen Use 272

Getting help with whitelists and blacklists 272

Maintaining consistency 273

Setting a Positive Example within Your Family 274

Starting with small changes 274

Trying bigger tips 275

Chapter 16: The Future of Internet and Screen Addiction 279

Noting That Screen Technology Isn’t Essential 280

Seeing the Issues That New Technology Will Bring 281

Facing a loss of freedom 282

Realizing that the latest may not be the greatest 282

Identifying problems with 5G and beyond 283

Looking at the Tech of the Future 285

Beaming the Internet everywhere 285

Wearing your tech 286

Implanting devices 287

Tackling Increased Internet and Technology Addiction in the Future 288

Life isn’t found on a screen 288

The growing backlash against tech obsession 289

Part 5: The Part of Tens 291

Chapter 17: Ten Things You Can Do to Reduce Your Internet Use 293

Take a Hard Look at How and Where You Are Spending Your Time 294

Take a Week to Become Aware of How You Use Your Screens 295

List Your Goals for Your Life 295

Write Down the Ten Values That You Hold Most Dear 296

Pick One Day to Steer Clear of Your Smartphone 297

Take the Waiting Room Challenge 297

Stop Taking Your Phone into the Bathroom, the Kitchen, or on a Walk 298

Delete All the Junk Email You Have and Unsubscribe to All Unneeded Emails 299

Turn Off Every Notification You Can 299

Put Yourself on a Digital Diet 299

Chapter 18: (Nearly) Ten Ways to Help Your Loved One with an Internet Addiction 301

Communicate a Clear Message of Love and Concern 302

Consider the Level of Help That Your Loved One Might Need 302

Try to Get Your Loved One to Join in Your Effort to Help, But Take Your Time 303

Have a Conversation about Your Loved One’s Goals, Desires, and Interests 304

Set Limits and Boundaries 304

Use Monitoring, Blocks, and Filters 305

Consider Professional Help 306

Don’t Take Your Loved One’s Use or Lies Personally 306

Above All, Have Hope 307

Chapter 19: Ten Tips for Overcoming Internet Addiction and Screen Overuse 309

Set Aside Time and Places for Not Using Screens 310

Never Have Your Phone Out during Meals 311

Stop Using Your Phone as an Alarm Clock 311

Avoid Smartphones or Screens at Least an Hour before Bed 311

Turn Off as Many Notifications as Possible and Consolidate Apps 312

Install Software or Apps That Monitor Screen Use Time 313

Set Your Screen to Black and White 313

Create a “Real-Time 100” List 314

Learn to Tolerate Boredom 314

Never Pick Up Your Phone While Driving 315

Index 317

David N. Greenfield, PhD, MS, is the Founder and Clinical Director of The Center for Internet and Technology Addiction and former Assistant Clinical Professor of Psychiatry at the University of Connecticut School of Medicine, and Consulting Medical Director at Lifeskills South Florida. He is a leading authority on behavioral and process addiction, Internet and screen behavior, and the treatment of Internet and video game addiction, and is author of Virtual Addiction.